Slight Sigh of Relief

So finally i believe my bitchiness has gotten through. Whats left is a very whiney "poor me" boy, who "sucks at life" blah blah blah (please get over yourself!)

and guess what?

i do not care : )

i do not care what happens anymore, nor do i care what any of them think. it is none of their business, nor is it their problem, and if they want to coddle him, have at it. It doesn't solve anything, nor does it help. WhAtEvEr!!

So i still feel nervous, but much better overall. And i am quite good at avoiding situations and not seeing people in person for at least a month or so.... i haven't seen M, for example, since... early January... its a beautiful thing. I do not need these people, and frankly, i do not want to be around them.

He tried, but it was too much, and it made me regret everything.
M has sort of tried, but moreso used me as a therapist and has never sincerely asked how i am.

and its really funny how little they all know about me. i am actually the last one to invite M. out, so its not my turn. i don't enjoy hanging out with depressing bullies anyway. (hopefully if i vent enough i will not care whatsoever and generally feel better about everything.) With that in mind,

fears:
1. T still associates with them for the most part, and i do not want there to be too much "weirdness". At the same time, he is also usually the first to jump ship and really only wants to play games and do guy stuff as he cannot stand M, so that limits the social engagements (which is just fine).
2. .... huh...
so i guess there is only one fear, and its not really that bad either...

complaints:
M doesn't try to change, and i truly believe she is all talk because i never see a difference.
M does not listen, or else she wouldn't be where she is.
M. loves to complain and moan and groan. Some of it is valid and does suck, but most of it is not.
M. is so submissive yet clingy/dominant that its gross; and yet bizarrely (and also grossly) kinky- ew.
M's relationship is unbalanced; they do not communicate well. its like a sad little damaged puppy, and the owner who has to take care of her. its weird and unhealthy.
M. does not need to have a family. and if this does happen, i really hope i live in another state.

I will leave M's s'o out of this, as its unnecessary to bring it up.

don't really have any problems with C/C... and the other has been previously mentioned (several times) And that about sums up the core. Thankfully, M has other friends now so i do not need to play a big part in anything. I have been fortunate enough to be left alone for a bit, and its lovely! I do love the gossip, which i need to get over... but gossip is just so much fun to hear because its usually absurd haha.

so its not as bad as i thought... sweet! now i need to practice my mantra:

let it go. let it go. let it go. let it go. let it go. let it go. let it go. let it go. let it go...





...and the peasants rejoiced