but way too often in my life.
self-taught, self induced, of course.
every time i think about eating,
moreso out than at home, but rather just with others,
i am then immediately trying to calculate when and where i can purge afterwards.
how sick is that?
even when i am making dinner, i worry about it
and try to see if i can somehow squeeze it in, without being noticed.
sick puppy indeed.
but what else would i have to worry about if i didn't stress about this?
how bout everything in my life that i cannot control that isn't going too well!
so it essentially breaks down to:
continue my vicious, detrimental habit
or
be so insanely depressed that suicide will not be a fleeting thought!
wonderful options, no?
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